Journaling is a simple yet powerful way to express yourself. It encourages you to connect with your thoughts and emotions, practice gratitude, and boost your self-awareness. By making time to write and reflect each day, you can learn more about yourself, your needs, and create positive changes in your life.
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A few weeks ago, I came across American author, academic, and public speaker, Arthur C. Brooks on The Drew Barrymore Show and he introduced the idea of keeping a “failure and disappointment” journal. We’re all familiar with the conventional way of journaling, which is writing about the positive things, but have you heard about the unconventional way that includes writing about the negative ones in detail?
What is a “failure and disappointment” journal?
A “failure and disappointment” journal is dedicated to writing down the things that negatively impact your mood in detail. Whether it’s an experience you’ve had, a comment someone made, or if something didn’t go your way. It gives you a safe space to vent and to ask yourself, “How did this make me feel? Why does their opinion matter?”
Unhappiness will be part of your journey to happiness.
arthur c. brooks.
When I first heard of this method I thought to myself, “Why would I want to write these things down and keep it around?” But it concept slowly started to make sense. The purpose of having a “failure and disappointment” journal is so you can come back to it sometime later and reveal what you’ve learned from those moments.
How it works
When something is troubling you, write down your feelings and set a reminder on your phone/calendar to come back to this page one month later. When it’s time, write down one thing you learned about yourself because of that experience. Afterwards, set another reminder for six months later, this time you’re going to write about a good thing that happened because of that experience.
Brooks shared this example while on The Drew Barrymore Show… You start a new job and your supervisor says you’re doing B- work. You write in your journal that you’re devastated because you thought you were doing better. When you come back to your entry in one month you say, “I thought I was going to be upset about that for a long time, but I learned that I was okay after 3 or 4 days.”
When you come back to your journal entry in 6 months you might say, “It turned out I wasn’t a match for that job, but a good thing that came out of it was it pushed me to find my current job which I’m really good at and loving.” Brooks says that this practice makes you excited to write in your journal because it shows your personal progress.
How it breaks the cycle
Our minds have a way of replaying negative experiences, but without a solution to stop this cycle, it ends up causing stress and this repetitive pattern continues as a habit. The next time something arises, rather than getting caught up on the thought that this feeling will never go away, it’ll remind you of your previous journal entries.
This practice trains your brain to take your time assessing the situation and find a solution, rather than dwelling on it and have these negative feelings stay with you or arise again in the future. By keeping a “failure and disappointment” journal, we’re able to approach these negative feelings from a place that encourages healthy habits and growth.
In conclusion, journaling in an unconventional way has many benefits. It’s an effective and visual way you can manage negative feelings, because each time you come back to this journal, you’ll have something positive to add to these experiences. If you liked this idea, check out Brooks’ latest book release with Opray Winfrey titled Build the Life You Want. What are your thoughts on Arthur Brooks’ idea of a “failure and disappointment” journal? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
RELATED POST: 5 Reasons Why You Should Start Journaling
Jamiee says
This is so interesting! I’m going to start doing this, I usually just write about the good things during that day, thank you for sharing this perspective.
Her Digital Coffee says
I hope you enjoy this method of journaling! Thank you for reading Jamiee.
Heidi | The Frugal Girls says
I had never heard of this style of journaling before. I really do like the concept of making a point to focus on the good that almost always comes from difficult circumstances.
Her Digital Coffee says
I agree, difficult situations always teach us something and this method encourages us to look past our initial emotions. Thank you for reading Heidi!
Josiah - DIY Thrill says
I love these tips!! Definitely going to try this with my journaling.
Her Digital Coffee says
I’m glad to hear that, Josiah! Thank you for reading.
ER LeVar says
I always find what Arthur C. Brooks has to say interesting! I didn’t see this particular interview–thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Her Digital Coffee says
That’s great to hear! I’m looking forward to checking out more of his work. Thank you for reading ER!
Molly | Transatlantic Notes says
This is such a unique way to use a journal, and perhaps even more helpful than the typical way they are used! I have never heard of a disappointment and failure journal, but I absolutely can see it’s value. I will have to see if I can go and watch that episode of Drew Barrymore’s show as this sounds fascinating!
Her Digital Coffee says
I agree, this method instills healthier habits. I have the episode linked in this post! Thank you for reading Molly!
Karalee says
I have never heard of a failure and disappointment journal before, but I love the idea of writing down something that bothered me and then coming back 1 month and 6 months later to reflect on what I learned and the positive things that happened as a result.
Her Digital Coffee says
Yes, it’s such a great method that tracks your personal growth. Thank you for reading Karalee!
Melissa says
This sounds like such a great method for journaling! Thanks for sharing this! 🙂
https://melissakacar.com
Her Digital Coffee says
I’m glad you think so! Thank you for reading Melissa!
Klaudia Zuberska says
A very interesting idea. Your blog will always inspire 🙂 Thank you for these tips!
Her Digital Coffee says
Thank you so much Klaudia, I appreciate your kind words!
Fransic verso says
This is interesting, well, I know about it because I do it as well. However, not the same as you mentioned. Would love to try it.
Her Digital Coffee says
I’m happy you’re going to give this method a try. Thank you for reading Fransic!
Claire @ Eleventh Avenue says
This is a fascinating concept, thank you for sharing! I sometimes include the negatives in my journals but the idea of having a failure and disappointment journal makes sense. I can see how helpful it is to get these thoughts off our minds and reflect on them later on.
Her Digital Coffee says
Yes, it’s a great tool that helps you redirect your way of thinking! Thank you for reading Claire!
Sam says
This journalling method sounds great. I love anything which allows us to move forward. With a fresh outlook!
Her Digital Coffee says
Yes! A fresh perspective is always great. Thank you for reading Sam!
Lucy says
I love this journalling method you’ve discussed here, it’s something I would be willing to try! I like that you write down your thoughts then refer back to them a month later and reflect on how you reacted to those thoughts x
Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk
Her Digital Coffee says
I’m happy to hear that it’s something you’d try! It’s a great approach that instills better habits and tracks our growth. Thank you for reading Lucy!
Jodie says
This is an interesting idea and I can see how it might be beneficial. Thanks for sharing about it Winnie!
Her Digital Coffee says
Thank you for reading Jodie!